April 14th, 2005

I Will Not Defame New Orleans.

A Past Life…

Found this email squirrelled away in my old hotmail account. It's a letter I wrote to changingthesky in February, 1999 when I was working at Bryn Mawn College outside Philly as a computer paramedic for clueless (in the techie world — not in their chosen fields) faculty members.

I am at once in awe of where life has led me since those days, and also very glad I could have a sense of humor about things that legitimately pissed me off. I think if I had not been so busy laughing at things in my life the way they were, I could not have gotten through them and evolved.

Dearest Lizlizliz:

For your idle-precious-moment perusal. The first bit is the original help call ticket that I wrote. The second bit, a complaint about help call tickets directed quietly and subversively towards me. Then, my response, then the response to that. Comments [italicized, in square brackets] are my editorial post scripts.
Ticket #4903. For Barbara G____. When printing to their networked HP Laserjet III they get a 'Service 50' error. The offensive printer is in Judy G____'s office. \todd\ 2/9/99 11:29:54 AM.
All Help Desk Techs, [uh, that's me. solely]
Please get as much info. from the Users when entering trouble que tickets.I've noticed that a lot of tickets continue-not to have all of the info. except for the Users name,office,ph# and that a peice of
equipment is broken. Ticket 4903,Barbara G____ is an example of a severly incomplete record. [I love it when you use strong words!] BMC Users are quite able to supply you with their model names,serial numbers and/or inventory numbers. [BMC users, in my experience, are actually able to do very little indeed.] If their repair requests are E-mailed in with insufficient info., contact and advise them pertinent info. is needed to speed there repair request.We must make our Users know the importance of giving all of their equipments info. and errors codes. [umm, which I did. HP Laserjet III, networked. 'Service 50' error. ANYWAY!] This make it possible for me to diagnose the problem and figure what tools,tech. and parts I will need to use,to attend to their problems....Thanks, Rodney
Hey Rodney:

I'd be happy to oblige your request. But what further information, for example on #4903, would you like? Printers don't have inventory numbers, do they? I got the make of printer, the error message and the location of the printer. "They" refers to "people who would like to use the printer" if that's confusing you. ('Service 50' is a cleaning problem, isn't it? Or am I messing up that error with another. Pish. All these numbers.)

Do let me know what you would prefer and I shall comply and assimilate forsooth! \todd\
Yes,printers don't have inv. numbers but the model numberand name is usually on the front of the device. [which I supplied] The serial numbers are usually located by the bar code in the rear of it. The "Service 50" is a fuser error.This was good in suppling this info. [pat on the head. wagging tail] From this I know I need to suspect or order a new Fuser assemby.....It's just that I don't know for what type and model of printer. You're not messing up,at all.You're doing a fantastic job. [tongue lolling. bit o' drool] It's just that I'm saying don't let the Users get away with just saying..."Hey my computer,monitor,printer.... is broke". We can't let the Users get away with this! ["HELL NO! WE WON'T GO!"] After all,It's their equipment that is broke and in need of attention. Thanks for your enthusiasm! [um, it was sarcasm actually. Same suffix though.]
So my dear Lizlizliz. Could you supply me with an equally honest depiction of your work-product-banter-and-the-such? Although I'm working a rather corporate job, I still manage to work in words like 'forsooth'. I imagine you do as well.

I like to think so anyway.

29 minutes and I'm out like Fendi,