December 1st, 2004

I Will Not Defame New Orleans.

I Loves Me Some <TABLE> Tags

  • Ben is cute when he's asleep.
  • StupidKitty is cute when she slinks around the house like she owns da fuckin' joint.
  • Best-Friend-Pamela is moving into Clifford's downstairs apartment.
  • I like my job.
  • I have Creative Projects in the mix, yo.
  • Rather good health, despite all the work I put into destroying my body.
  • Going to see family for xmas.
  • Going to see bio-mum, bio-sis, meet my bio-nieces and see Fantastic Judy in January in Seattle.
  • Fuzzy socks.
  • I don't like the cold weather. At all.
  • Sad about PeeingKitty who has been exiled to the back balcony where's it's cold.
  • Recent rains and clogged gutters are making Clifford's walls soft and spongey.
  • There are too many projects and not enough time.
  • My neck is as sore as a Vietnamese hooker on a sailor's payday.
  • Have to go to California to see family for xmas. Bleargh.
  • Bush. Again.
I Will Not Defame New Orleans.

Stepford Wives

I finally saw the new Nicole Kidman version of Stepford Wives last night. Hence, this review of the whole Stepford Thang: [warning: spoilers ahead]
  • Started off as a probing and poignant social commentary in Ira Levin's (badly-written) book.
  • Was made into poignant and subtle movie with Katharine Ross and Paula Prentiss (drool!) in 1975. The movie caught the brilliance of the book's concept but improved on the bad writing. This film is the litmus for All Things Stepford. (And features a five year old Mary Stuart Masterson — KEWT!.)
  • A number of silly, gimmicky, made-for-TV spinoffs erupted over the next 30 years including:
    • Revenge of the Stepford Wives
    • Stepford Husbands
    • Stepford Children
    • Stepford Life
    • Stepford Dogs & Cats
    • Stepford Dustbunnies
    • Something Stepford This Way Comes
    • Mondo Stepford
    • Etc., ad nauseum
    These productions were just silly, underfunded, underproduced trifles.
  • 2004: Big Hollywood Money created the new Stepford Wives with Nicole Kidman, Bette Midler, Glenn Close, Mathew Broderick, etc. Nice cast. Granted, Levin's original concept is a bit dated these days — the housewification of women isn't as inevitable these days as it was in the early 70s. So the writers of the new S.W. tried to update the tired (but still brilliant and poignant) theme for the 21st c. Good for them.

    There were ambitious changes to the script. The addition of a gay couple wouldn't have been seen 30 years ago. The husband (Broderick) undermined the Stepford Regime and wouldn't sell his wife into robot-dom in the eleventh hour. Joanna (Kidman) left a high-power TV exec career in favor of suburban life, apparently by choice. These elements seem promising to create a new and interesting angle to the old formula. However…

    All these changes failed miserably. We can feel no sympathy for the two-dimensional, where's-my-motivation heroine the way she is written and (alas) played. (Oh, Nicole, what have you done?) The addition of the accepted gay couple is footnoted with, "It's okay to be gay — as long as you live your gay life as if you had just stepped off the set of Queer Eye." The husband's rebellion against the community makes no sense whatsoever as he is cowed and whipped and insecure throughout the whole thing — the reason he opted for Stepford in the first place. If that's the case, then he should happily turn Joanna into a robot. His epiphany was unfounded and unbelievable.

    All the blonde, bimbo wives were once high-powered business women. The men feel insecure about being married to smart women, so they turn them into fembots. It's just not believable. Such intelligent, driven women would not marry such a pack of drooling fools as these weak men in the first place.

    The 'surprise ending' that Stepford was created by a misguided, insane woman pretty much negates the whole point of the story, stripping this otherwise noble concept down to a farce.

    Add to that the addition of a Pixar dog and you've got a big, nicely shot but stupid, stupid movie.

    I don't know about you, but I am sick to death of Pixar.

    I'm going to console myself and watch the 1975 version again before this new travesty sticks in my brain.
I Will Not Defame New Orleans.

La Vie, C'est Étrange.

Ben and I are postponing a little work trip to Vegas until Friday so that tomorrow we can be in a movie starring Freddie Prinze Jr.

Ben will be a fry cook.

I will be a dragqueen whore.

So nothing much has changed.