November 3rd, 2004

I Will Not Defame New Orleans.

It's No Laughing Matter

This one is going out to all my friends and peeping toms who live otherwhere than the U.S. of A'holes.

The first time our admittedly wretchedly backwards country allowed a monkey-faced madman steal an election and drive the most powerful, influencial country into the ground, we who live here could wince and wail and moan and feel embarrassed for what our country had done, but at least we could take solace in the fact that no one elected him. That is was a botched job. That the immovable Powers Dat Be, Yo, did the dastardly deed against the wishes of the populace.

To sum: the first time, it was the fault of our corrupt government, but we as citizens could hold our heads — if not high — than at least eye-level.

The second time, however…

…the second time…

…the second time…

…oh, oh, oh, oh dear.

Ohhhhh dear.

51% of Americans asked for this.

They asked for this.

They want this.

51%!

That's, like, half! Half of the people with whom I share a country made a voluntary choice for four more years of inner corruption, world domination and a total lack in social, scientific or medical progression.

To sum: Oh, my friends in Europe, Asia, the Ukraine, South America, Australia and the moon, you hereby have full citizenship pardon to laugh your asses off completely at our expense. We deserve the very worst you can dish out.

Cos, believe me, America's gonna be dishin' out what's even worse than you can conjure.

You get a free roll on us.

That is all I'm going to say on the matter, except for this: When I heard this morning that we're up for another four years of Dubya, I cried. First and only time politics have meant anything to me.

And I think there's a lot to cry about.