December 8th, 2002

I Will Not Defame New Orleans.

I Can’t Be In Four Places At Once.

But I can try.

What I wanted to do last night:
  1. Go to Shim Sham to catch a performance of Grenadine McGunkle's Double-Wide Christmas with some friends. 8:30p
  2. Get completely across town to Rock And Bowl for the premiere showing of "Attack of the Cock Faced Killer," the movie which features housemate Nalcée and Tempo fucking in a barn and being murdered. Movie allegedly also features yours truly as an androgynous goth in a bar. 10:00p
  3. Cut completely back across town again to see Hazard County Girls play at El Matador. Midnight.
  4. Go to work (conveniently a block from Matador) at 2:00a.
What actually happened.
  1. Went to Shim Sham. Didn't find my friends. The show was sold out, but luckily I do the club's web site so I managed to sneak in. (Thanks, Flynn!) The show was absofuckinglutely hilarious, and I cannot recommend it enough. Try and catch it. It's playing every Friday and Saturday through December. You won't be disappointed. If you are, I'll make it up to ya. Everything that comes out of Running With Scissors theatre troupe is branded with its own unique and thoroughly blackened wit and humor. And their founding father, Mr. Sturtle, is one hot potatuh to boot.
  2. The show ended in plenty of time to get Uptown for the movie premiere, but this is one of the very few times I wish I hadn't sold my car. I don't generally need one in New Orleans, and I feel quite liberated with just my clunky bicycle. But it makes dashes across town a little bit … impossible. So I hung out with Pamela at the upstairs bar at Shim Sham and watched "Sick: The Life & Death of Bob Flanagan, Supermasochist" instead. Seemed a befitting fate. Instead of a Cock Faced Killer, I watched ole' bob nail his scrotum to a plank of wood.

    Nalcée tells me the show was absolutely packed to capacity and went over very well. He then presented me with the DVD of the film, god bless his tender soul. I've watched about half of it and laughed out loud at his fuck/death scene, and recalled with great fondness the night of the shoot that I attended when the bar scene came on. I, happily or un-, did not end up on the cutting room floor, and my 15 seconds of dubious fame have been burned indellibly onto DVD. Stopped watching the movie when Nalcée had company over, ironically (?) the director of the film. They're downstairs at the moment listening to death metal and getting high. I'll join them in a moment.
  3. Left Shim Sham to wander over to Decatur. Wasn't in a music mood, so I skipped Hazard County Girls, which of course I later heard turned out to be a fantastic show, so I'm a loser — so what — and fuck you too. Popped into Molly's for a cockytail and chittychat with Lloyd, Tim, et al.
  4. Progressed to work, already tired due to sleep dep, and worked a rockin', fun, lucrative night. Thanks be for the energy and vibes of the people who hung out last night. Any less rock-n-rollitude and I would have collapsed on the filthy bar mats.
  5. Home by noon. Slept like a baby — a very, very dead baby — till about 8:30p. Realized I had missed Pamela's Xmas party. Rang her up to bestow my 'umble apollywogs. She listed the menu that I was missing, made me cry, and told me she'd bring me some leftovers to work tonight. Which just made me cry harder for all the love in this god forsaken town.